Zit's terrifying!

I have a zit on my chin. No big deal, you're thinking. It happens. Yeah, but you haven't seen this zit. A facialist told me that women tend to break out on their chins when they're stressed. The level of stress this zit indicates makes me a veritable medical miracle. I should be dead. No human can handle that level of stress.

This zit is the Krakatoa of zits. It's threatening to eat my entire face, starting with my chin. It feels like someone cut a fat grape in half and stuffed one half under my skin. Oh, and the grape is made of concrete. It's the zit that ate Manhattan. It's Godzilla. It's turning me into a lopsided Jay Leno. Seriously, it's a wonder I can even keep my head straight, seeing as my face is five pounds heavier on one side.

Excuse me. I have an appointment with the freak show folks. They're putting me on display as the human zit.

p.s. I got another check for $12.11 from Comcast of New Haven! Yeah!